I’m Only Human…
I’m interrupting my “Right Way” post* to throw down some thoughts I’ve had, am having, and maybe will continue to have, about the whole Tiger Woods situation.
Yes I know it technically can not be called an interruption when I just haven’t written Part 2 yet, but saying “interrupting” does more to help my cause, so that’s what you get.
Some months ago when the story began to come out about the Tiger Woods affairs and the circumstances surrounding the wreck of his vehicle, I remember listening to radio pundits and reading folks in the media for what they had to say. Usually, mostly, I have my own very strong, and sometimes wayward, opinions about things that fit me and my lifestyle, but I like listening and reading to what other intelligent people have to say to see if I’m on the right track.
And so when the story initially broke there seemed to be three camps: 1. I don’t care what this guy does in his personal life, he’s a great golfer. 2. I don’t care what this guy does in his personal life, he’s a great golfer, and I always knew he was kind of an a-hole anyway. 3. See, he’s human after all.
Now one of these camps infuriates me to no end with just how ridiculous the notion is but let’s take it one step at a time.
1. I can understand the sentiment of not caring what he does when he’s not playing – because I don’t – be the notion that he’s a golfer and a golfer only, strikes me naïve. Yes he’s probably the best in the world at what he does and probably the best of all time, but there’s more to it than what you do in your chosen* profession, and I’m not talking merely about his “responsibility” to his fans because he has none.
I use the word “chosen” because that’s exactly what it is: chosen. No one asked Tiger Woods to be a golfer. No one asked Tiger Woods to endorse Nike, Gatorade, and Gillette, and be all over our TVs. No one asked Tiger Woods for anything. He chose it. He knew what he was getting into. This is like the celebrity that shouts about how the paparazzi are intrusive and doesn’t let them live normal lives. Well, don’t be a celebrity. No one follows me to work everyday with a camera. No one I’ve ever known is followed to work everyday with a camera. You chose that life now shut-up and deal with it. If you don’t like it, get out. The world needs ditch diggers too.
I’m talking about his responsibility to People. You see Tiger Woods, as well as all of us, have the responsibility to be decent, respectful, responsible people that don’t cheat, steal, and treat others poorly. Most everyone follows these Rules of People. Some don’t. And to those that don’t eventually it catches up to them. And eventually, they hold press conferences saying they’re sorry.
2. The camp that I am firmly entrenched in. Look it isn’t as if this kind of behavior was all that impossible to see coming. Yes we thought, or were made to think, that Tiger Woods was/is a man of incredible integrity and character, thus he’s put on a pedestal. But his actions on the course – constantly yelling at spectators, demeaning his old caddy, how he publicly talked trash on his old swing coach – are things that should have flashed huge warning signs.
Does this camp also walk the fine line between hatred and jealousy? Absolutely. And maybe that’s why this camp is probably the most vocal out of the three. But out of hatred and jealousy a person can find their worst critics, and therein, find there clearest path to personal maturity. This is especially the case for Tiger Woods.
We saw a little bit of why this is true today in the Apology 2010 press conference. Tiger took a little responsibility, and even went so far to say that he felt entitled* to certain pleasures and therefore acted on them. Woods’ harshest critics have been saying from the first day this whole thing happened this was the case for a man that was raised as a phenom, portrayed as a savoir, and celebrated as infallible. Woods has always acted like he was above the rest of us mortal people because of his on course, and largely irrelevant, golfing abilities.
One of the things that bothers me most about people is when they give themselves personal descriptive adjectives in an effort to explain who they are as a person. My favorite is “I’m mature.” Mature is a descriptive term that can only be given to you by someone else. It’s a perceived or earned adjective. When Woods today said he felt “entitled,” I didn’t think he was caught in a personal web of reflection, looking back saying “I was a real idiot.” I thought he was using some buzzword that he had heard time and again. Which, really, is what people are doing when they say “I’m mature.”
But now that his whole aura has taken a shot I’m shocked at the number of people that have been overcome by surprise at who Woods really was/is. A person that tries to manipulate and control everything around him – but I guess, let’s be honest, if I had that kind of pull I may do the same thing – clearly has something to hide. It doesn’t necessarily have to be something on the scale of cheating on your wife with upwards of 20 or more women, but something to hide nonetheless. So the revelation of his “transgressions” (aren’t you getting tired of hearing that word? Buzz) didn’t come as a surprise to me, I always found the guy a little dishonest and selfish anyway.
3. And then there’s the ridiculous. The “he’s only human” or “see, he’s just like the rest of us” excuse. Um, what? Yes, I suppose, you could make the argument that he’s only human in body and spirit, but shouldn’t that be where it stops? I’m only human but I’ve never yelled at someone taking a picture, or INVITED reporters to a press conference and told them they can’t ask any questions. (So is it really a press conference?) This is like the agents or publicists for actors whose clients get caught with drugs and say “he’s only human.” WHAT? Again, I’m only human, yet I’ve never smoked a joint, seen a joint, or ever intend on being around a joint. There are ethical and moral boundaries some people choose to live by. Remember, there are certain responsibilities each of us hold to People.
The “he’s only human” gambit is more along the lines of an “I’m sorry but.”
I’m sorry I didn’t put the dishes away, but I was tired.
I’m sorry I didn’t put the seat down, but I was in a hurry.
I’m sorry I called you those names, but I was really upset.
I’m sorry I cheated on my wife and acted like a jerk for the last 15-years to everyone I’ve ever been in contact with, but I’m only human.
See?
Being “only human” doesn’t give you a hall pass to being a jerk, an adulterer, a selfish jackass. Being “only human” means those things never crossed your mind in the first place.
Til’ next time.